Monday, February 18, 2008

The Solution

Blah blah blah haven't written in awhile blah blah blah keeping busy blah blah blah.

Ok, to the post.

This happens every year. It's February. We get down. The weather sucks. Christmas has been forgotten, the Super Bowl is just a memory, we're not baseball fans, and there's nothing slated until Easter rolls around.

We've had "Oh, let's just have a family reunion in the middle of February for timing reasons" before, but it never sticks. We need a premise, even if it's a premise as flimsy as "Labor Day." It's still a premise, and it's more than we have for Made-Up Holiday in February Reunion.

Well, I have a premise. And it's awesome. I think we need to have an inaugural Andy's Family February Backgammon Invitational in 2009. I'm conceding 2008, as there are only 11 days left in the month, but this we should get this started next year.

"But Andy," the whinier members of my family might say if there were any, "I don't know how to play Backgammon."

Well, the February Backgammon Invitational would give you the perfect opportunity to learn. I assure you it will be worth it. I have taught 3 girlfriends to play Backgammon now, and all of them loved it. For awhile, my long-distance relationship with AJ was held together with nothing but Internet Backgammon.

"But Andy," the more insecure members of my family might say if there were any, "didn't you win a Backgammon Tournament once in 1994? How ever will we avoid a merciless shellacking at your skilled hands?"

Why, yes, I did win the Backgammon tournament at the Big M Math Camp For Extremely Nerdy and Socially Awkward Tweeners in the summer of 1994, thanks for remembering. (It should be added that I was a legitimate qualifier for Big M Math Camp, and not a mere alternate who snuck in the backdoor, unlike certain older siblings who have secret blogs they never post on.) Bear in mind, however, that before Big M, I had never played a game of Backgammon in my life, and upset a lifelong player in the finals. There's a lot of strategy in Backgammon, but there's a lot of luck as well. The better player will usually, but not always win, and the underdog always has a puncher's chance.

Plus, all of you are either married or attached to someone long-term. You'll have plenty of time to practice your backgammon skills.

"But Andy," my more complaining family members could say, "why couldn't we play something we already play, like Euchre?"

Because we already play Euchre at Christmas. No one would drive up for a family reunion that's just a crappy sequel to Christmas without the pageantry. No, it has to be something special.

Plus, Backgammon is one-on-one, and nearly equal parts skill and luck. Plus, it's easy, so the kids can enter the tournament sooner rather than later. I'm already dreading drawing Phoebe in the first round of the 2012 tournament. Not only that, but backgammon is crazy-cheap (if you pay $5 for a backgammon set, it better be a super-deluxe one), and very fast to play. We could make the tournament a double-elimination and still get it over with in an hour and a half, which leaves plenty of time for drinking or sobering up. Hell, we throw in a traveling trophy, or better yet, some sweet WWE replica championship belts, and the whole thing will be irresistibly awesome. Seriously. Can you see yourself resisting the lure of Backgammon championship belts? I cannot.

But, mostly, I just love playing backgammon, and I hate the fact that most people just know it as that weird looking game on the back of the checkerboard.

So, anyone else up for this, or is my backgammevangelism falling on deaf ears?


Emily said...

I can't believe you brought up the whole alternate thing... I am totally in tears right now.

Andy said...

Well, now that I'm the only member of the family that has an awesome blog, I figure that gives me unchecked power to take potshots at the rest of you at will.

Look for a HeroQuest post in the near future.

Casey said...

Oh, it is ON.

Casey said...

Also, I need your email.

Anonymous said...

ok, i've never played backgammon before, but he idea of championship backgammon belts is totally selling it for me. i think i may have to learn. thanks!


liz said...

Is it just for family or can bloggy backgammon fans join in?

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