Monday, June 16, 2008

Hey! Look! A Blog Post!

So I recently just stumbled upon some blog. It's called "The Ballpoint Banana." The tone seems to be largely sarcastic and condescending, but I think it's a style I might be able to mimic, so I thought I'd give it a shot.

I suppose now would be a perfect time to write about why I write a blog and, even more appropriately, why I do not write a blog.

1. Video Games. When I have a host of fun games at my disposal to play, it dominates my time. Always has. I've been playing video games since before I could read, and I do not see this trend slowing at any point. Recently I discovered I have a Grand Theft Auto addiction, and I have finished Grand Theft Auto III, Vice City, and San Andreas since my previous blog post. I am also halfway through Liberty City Stories on my PSP, playing it only when I am on break at work or when Kelli is shopping for shoes or purses and I am bored.

Speaking of Kelli, the Video Game playing has only increased because I purchased a Wii which we now play all the time. Kelli has enjoyed scant few video games, but she loves the Wii. The prospect of playing video games with a girlfriend is simply to awesome to ignore, so many hours have been played in front of the Wii.

On top of all this, I have The Sims Complete Collection that Kelli and I played for a few weeks before we got the Wii (see, finding a video game to play with the significant other has always been a high priority for me), so I have a whole slew of games that I could lavish my attention on. Or I can write boring blog posts, try for a while to make them interesting, fail, and then go play fun video games.

2. Kelli: Kelli, in case you haven't caught on, is my girlfriend, and she represents a dramatic shift in my dating patterns. I have this whole "fear of commitment" issue going on, largely based on the fact that my life is in no way stable, I'm not settled in what I want to be doing long-term, and I can't say where I'll be this time next year. The uncertainty is not conducive for relationships. However, I still enjoy going out with people, so what I would always do was find girlfriends whose company I enjoyed but couldn't see myself being with longterm due to complete psychosis or general dumbness. My coworker Claudia referred to them as "floozies," and I think that's a rather apt description. Kelli, however, is smart, and funny, and sane. She's also accommodating and friendly and good to me. So my mindset has switched from it's default "This will do for now" setting to "Dear God Let's Not Screw This One Up" setting. This new setting takes quite a bit more attention.

3. Lack of conflict: Life is going well right now. I'm rarely, if ever, bored at home. I spend a good chunk of time with my girlfriend. My car has actually been performing as it is supposed to. I'm even lacking on hilariously embarrassing injuries of late, although the massive sunburn on the top of my knee that I incurred while driving home from Cousin Camp this weekend is up there. The only real conflict is from work, and it is mostly alleged, and it would also be most unwise to talk about it on the internets, so I'm not writing about that. Without conflict, there's not much of a story arc, and the blog turns into "The Journal of the Most Boring Person On the Planet". As such, I will probably spend most future entries taking something completely trivial and treating it as the most important problem facing society today, hoping that the disparity between tone and subject matter causes some comedic material. Look for "Wii Boxing: The Japanese Conspiracy Against the Vertically Gifted" in a future entry.


KathyR said...

Wow. He lives.

Glad all is reasonably well.

And, you know, being boring hasn't stopped me (and countless others) from blogging. Why should your standards be so frickin' high?

kathy a. said...

you're back!

liz said...

So nice to see you back!!

And I think you're probably right that the Japanese are punishing those who suffer from overheight. After all, they've already gone after those with expansive waistlines, why not those with excess inseams?