My college roommate D loved Neil Diamond. We ragged him pretty good about that, believe me. He also drank diet sodas, which also seemed unlikely for a scrawny male undergraduate. We lumped both traits together into his suite of middle-aged secretary behaviors. But who knows if secretaries really listen to Neil Diamond? D is the only person I've ever met who would admit to it.
My unit's evening shift employees went out for drinks and pizza after work on Friday night in honor of Jerry's last night on the shift. Here's a fun snippet of conversation:
Waitress: Can I get you anything?
Andy: Yes, I'd like a Bavarian Chocolate Cake and a Diet whatever you have... Coke it looks like.
Everyone else: (laughing)
Andy: What?
Jerry: Watching your figure there, Andy?
Claudia: Really. If you're getting a big chocolate cake, why go halfway with the Coke?
Andy: Look, my dentist told me to never drink sugared soda again. He said nothing about not eating chocolate cake.
4 comments:
Ha! In defense of Neil-Diamond-lovers and diet-soda-drinkers everywhere. Wait, the two aren't synonymous? Now I'm really confused. Glad your coworkers stepped up to plate and razzed you when the opportunity presented itself. Too bad about Jerry leaving though.
Later that night...
Jerry: How's the cake?
Claudia: It looks really rich.
Andy: It's all right, but the Diet Coke is simply delightful.
You know, I'm pretty sure even diet soda is bad for your teeth. I think I learned that from a public service announcement. Possibly.
Have you tried water? I hear it's delicious.
They make PSAs about diet coke?
The water that comes from my faucet has some brown rust coloration in it. That frightens. Plus diet pop tastes much better.
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